Lost in the Word, Held by God 🦋

There are days when I sit with my Bible open… and it feels like the words are flowing past me instead of into me.

I’m reading it, but I’m not processing it.

I’m trying, but I feel like I’m not receiving anything.

And in those moments, something inside me whispers questions I don’t want to hear…

“Why can’t I get it?”

“Why can’t I understand this?”

“God… are You even with me right now?”

It’s the kind of heaviness that makes you wonder if something is wrong with you.

Why can’t I focus?

Why can’t I quiet my thoughts?

Why can’t I fight my flesh when I know better?

And honestly… I get overwhelmed.

Life is loud.

Work is loud.

My mind is loud.

I’m always thinking too much.

Always questioning if God is present.

Always wondering if I’m doing enough or if I’m falling short.

But then I have to remind myself — these feelings are not from God.

This confusion, this heaviness, this fog… it’s not Him.

It’s the enemy trying to pull me away from the very thing that brings life, peace, and direction.

Because I know God’s character.

I know His heart.

I know He loves me deeply, even on the days when I’m struggling.

And that’s why I keep showing up.

Even when I feel lost, I show up.

Even when the Word feels hard to grasp, I show up.

Even when my thoughts are attacking me, I show up.

Because heaven is at stake.

My peace is at stake.

My purpose is at stake.

And God has never failed me — not once.

There are also moments when everything does click.

When I’m reading and the Scripture starts pouring into me like warm light.

When I whisper, “Yes Lord, speak to me,” and I feel Him meet me right where I am.

Those moments remind me why I keep fighting.

Why I keep choosing faith even when my feelings don’t match it.

So if you’re in a season where you feel lost in the Word…

If you’re trying your best but your mind feels scattered…

If you’re wondering why you can’t seem to grasp what God is trying to say…

This is for you:

If your heart is pure and you walk in God’s love and character, you are not failing.

You are not forgotten.

You are not alone.

It’s just the enemy trying to get you off your game.

Because he knows what God is building inside you.

He knows the woman you are becoming.

He knows heaven is fighting for you — so he tries to distract you.

But you?

You’re holding on.

You’re fighting back.

You’re seeking God even when it’s hard.

And that is faith.

That is strength.

That is love.

I may not understand everything I read.

I may not always feel God the way I want to.

I may not always silence my thoughts the moment they rise.

But I’m trying my best.

And I’m never letting go.

And neither should you.

Have you ever felt lost while reading the Bible? What helped you keep going?

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